[Geez what's with all the noise at this ungodly hour of the morning. Screaming "old man" definitely woke him up and brought him into the kitchen to see what the commotion was.]

If I was gonna bring a woman back she'd be in my bedroom, not on the kitchen table. [Blunt and to the point he moves closer to inspect.] Uh... that's not any lass I've seen before either...